Every time someone gets shot, people will be like, "Damn, he must have did something. " Niggers will say "I would blow your fucking head off--if I could afford it! Chris Rock (Bigger and Blacker) A bunch of girls say, "You don't need no man to help you raise no child" shut the fuck up with the bullshit!
'Cause if a bullet costs 00, there'd be no more innocent bystanders.
I can walk down any street in America and women will clutch their purses tighter, hold onto their mace, lock their car doors. "If they ain't cutting it off, I ain't paying." She would say, "The first bill is a suggestion.
If I look up into the windows of the apartments I pass, I can see old ladies on the phone. If they really want you to pay it, then they'll come and tap on your window." Her whole philosphy of life was: if you die owing money, then you've won. If you're one of the chosen few people in the world lucky enough to get your hands on a steak, bite the s**t out of it!
You won't be able to take your eyes off the next four presenters: Salma Hayek and Penelope Cruz. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse.
You know what that means when someone pays you minimum wage? Hey, if I could pay you less, I would, but it’s against the law. So, you can say “black people have made progress”, but to say “black people have made progress” would mean we deserved to be segregated. Every town has the same two malls: the one white people go to and the one white people used to go to.
Cause if a bullet cost 00 there would be no more innocent bystanders.
Nicole Kidman was smiling so wide, she should have won an Emmy at the Oscars for her great performance.
The only acting you ever see at the Oscars is when people act like they're not mad they lost.